Category Archives: Bert Hellinger

A Reflection On Familiarity and Diversity

I have recently become aware of how fond I am of my psychotherapy clients and how familiar they have become to me. What do I mean by this? My psychotherapy clients feel familial, as if we are related. And, in fact, we are! We are related in our humanity, in the proverbial “Family of Man”.

Nowhere is this familial connection more apparent than in the Family Constellation workshops that I facilitate. I suspect this is the reason why these workshops feel so safe for participants. In just a few hours together, strangers feel and trust the support of the other workshop participants and become bonded and trusting in our time together. In these workshops we celebrate our humanity, the ways that we are connected, common and familiar. We are not separate but connected in our humanness. Here, in this time, there is no more loneliness.

Yes, of course, we carry the blood of our ancestors. These connections are what we are there to explore in the workshops. Nevertheless, there is more to these Constellation Workshops.  

DNA science has demonstrated that if we look back far enough, we discover that the strains of blood that we carry are rarely pure. These strains are intermingled with surprising threads. It is my hypothesis that the intermingling of these threads is what creates our strength, vitality and evolutionary adaptability. One might view it as notes and tonal variations, perhaps even some discordant notes. And yet, when we come together, these notes resonate in unsuspected harmonies to become the miraculous one-of-a-kind symphony which reflects our individuality and our unions!

So, what we also see and experience in these moving workshops is our connection, despite our diversity. In these workshops we experience the humanity that unites all of us. This is the aspect of the work that leaves us feeling uplifted and open-hearted after our workshop experience. It is also what I see as the unification of the seemingly diverse aspects of my professional and spiritual practice: Integrative Psychotherapy, Family Constellations and my Ministerial functions.

And so, in conclusion, I believe that Hitler, and Donald Trump, had and have it all wrong! It’s our diversity that makes us strong, beautiful and connects us into a powerful, loving and familiar family. Today, and all days, celebrate the diversity and honor our connections and, care for your family!

A Reflection On Familiarity and Diversity

I have recently become aware of how fond I am of my psychotherapy clients and how familiar they have become to me. What do I mean by this? My psychotherapy clients feel familial, as if we are related. And, in fact, we are! We are related in our humanity, in the proverbial “Family of Man”.… Continue Reading

Fanny’s Pearls

A brief memoir of a time with my grandmother brings to mind reflections upon our ancestral legacy and our personal evolution: Fanny’s Pearls Sifting through the costumes of her life me, compelled by the beauty of the jewels, shiny,  sparkly, round smooth surfaces, metallic clasps Grandma Fanny and I sit on the bed, light streaming through the West End window.… Continue Reading

Another Synchronicity

Last weekend I facilitated a Constellation workshop in New York City. No matter how many times I do this, I am always moved, touched, and ultimately awed by the divine grace that manifests in these sacred events. This occasion was no exception. A week prior, I had received a phone call from a young man… Continue Reading

A Paradigm Shift

Last weekend I facilitated my regular monthly Constellation workshop. I always begin these workshops with a short talk that sets an intention for our work on that day. I trust that these themes are being constellated in our shared field as each of us prepares for the work ahead. And so, I trust the synchronicities… Continue Reading

On The Applications for Systemic and Family Constellations

A client and former workshop participant called me this morning to ask if a Constellation might help to resolve a situation he is challenged by in his workplace. This simple question stimulated me to reflect upon the diverse applications and approaches to this powerful modality of Systemic and Family Constellations. In my early training, following… Continue Reading